I have a very big decision ahead of me that will affect the next couple of years of my life. My roommates have chosen to move. Should I move with them, or should i move in with my boyfriend of almost 2 years? there are positives and negatives to both choices. most people i know don't even blink an eye and tell me to avoid bremerton like the plague (B'ton is where Frank lives). My roommates are moving to Puyallup, which is a decent city, and would still offer decent job opportunities. I wouldn't have to quite my current job as soon as i move, either, because it's close enough to drive to still. However, if i move with them, i wont' be able to move again until they can afford the whole place on their own, or are ready to move again themselves. they dont want to move again for another couple of years. also, i'd still be over an hour's drive away from frank. If i move in with frank, the rent is going to be extremely low (it would go up if i move to puyallup), but he's in a crappy trailor in a crappy trailor park in a city that's not so great itself, and far away from everything. (look it up on a map. it's aross the puget sound from seattle. i'm currently near tacoma) i'd have to get a new job, and there's not much up here, especially anything artsy. and frank isn't planning on moving for another couple of years either. both of us would be much better off over near redmond and seattle, but he refuses to move any place unless it's a house he buys. he doesn't want to rent again. so, id' be stuck in bremerton for a couple of years.
when i'm in lakewood, i feel it's best to move with my roommates. now i'm in bremerton, and i feel it's best to move up here. my biggest practical concern is employment. i can find something up here, but id' be going nowhere career wise. (however, i feel i'm doing that anyways) i like the job i have, but my hours have been getting cut due to less business than expected. i need to get a second job. i don't know where to look! i don't know exactly when i'll be moving. probably in a month or two. some friends of ours last night pointed out a job near frank, actually, for a graphic designer at a sign shop. i'm going to go check it out tomorrow.
i'm really torn. i don't want to make a decision too fast, but i don't want to be influenced too much by other people. only my friends that i know through frank say they want me to move over here. everyone else says it's a suicide mission. i'm grateful that they're concerned about what's best for me, but then, most of them dislike or even hate frank. also, i spent three months unemployed, and came up with CRAP for jobs. i don't have a degree that will get me a job. i'm not focused enough. i don't have specific enough skills. the thought floats around that maybe i should go back to school. go learn how to be a computer animator, finally! for now, i've totally lost my motivation to get a "career" job. just need somethign to get by for a while.
in summary, i'm stressed!!!! grr. i embrace a big change, that's no problem. oh, i also feel a lot of guilt leaving tonya and dan and the girls. i help them a LOT babysitting wise. i've helped raise those girls for 2 years now. they're family. ton's my best friend right now. it's not like i can't go see them and babysit occasionally, but i know how stressful their situation is, what with ton and dan both in school. on the flip side, they're a family unit. i'm the fifth wheel. i'm ready to move on. the kids are so stressful. but i remind myself that every situation has it's stress. they add so much to my life too. it's an odd setup, but it works. .....and then, what about my poor boyfriend? he's just waiting patiently for me. i help him with his depression, i give him a reason to be happy and goofy. i'm totally ready to move in with him, i just REALLY wish he didn't live in BFE. 
ok, summarizing again. *sigh* needed to get this down and off my back a little (yeah right). i'm going to try and make a decision this weekend, or early next week. it's a rush decision. that's the worst. we haven't put our notice in yet for moving, but the sooner the better for ton and dan. the house we're in right now has a lot of probs and is not in a great location. dan's parents offered to pay the deposit, and they want to jump on that. i don't blame them. they're bettering themselves, and now i gotta decide what will be the best for me.
ok i'll shut up now. what do you guys think? you're a little more outside the situation. and i'm tellin ya. if i were at home for the week and writing this, it'd totally be pro-puyallup. i'm pro-bremerton right now. i keep bouncing back and forth. :-\
i am no longer a honda girl! <:-o 
i hope to have more of these to share in the future. 
